Kirsten Williams: Self-imposed stress

I woke up today after a full 8 hours sleep (not always so easy these days). I got up and realized I was still tired, and it did not get better. Side effects of chemo often feel like what I used to call "the achy brachy's" when I was sick. Your whole body just aches and you feel like you have the flu. Today was one of those days. I guess the body just has to stop now and then and say "enough toxins and poisons, I need rest.........or else". So I eventually crawled back to bed for a 4 hour nap! Not my idea of excitement, but it is the process of healing and survival.

Finally at 4PM I got up and decided I was going for my daily "life walk". Called so because it is a huge part of my daily physical and spiritual journey towards healing. So I dragged myself down to Klineline and headed out. I was still feeling lousy and yet suddenly I had an "ah ha!" moment. I realized I was "in a hurry" to accomplish my walk within a certain specified time. I thought "you got to be kidding, I am so used to hurrying around that I think I need to hurry right now!". CRAZY. Definitely one of those big things I am supposed to learn, and today really opened the door for me. It is one thing to have a full schedule and push your way through a day or a week to accomplish it. It is another to to be living in a surrealistic self-imposed and totally unnecessary state of mind which doesn't really allow you to EVER "stop and smell the roses". I think I have been wound up so tight for so long, and although I have preached "stop and smell the roses" to my kids, I think my version of it has been bending over for a quick whiff while never stopping and continuing on running straight ahead.

What an eye opener for me. So.........I slowed down, stopped and took a bunch of pictures, absorbed every bit of the physical,spiritual, and mental aspect of my situation I could. Guess what............I thoroughly enjoyed myself!!!! Guess what else.......ultimately when I got back to my car it was exactly the same amount of time I would have "scheduled" for myself..........not that it mattered, it was just interesting, and very healing for me. So...........even though I'm sure you've seen it all before, here are a few of the pictures I took today, just mostly for me, to remember my great awakening!!